Are You Autistic? Do You Assume You Desire a Pet? — THINKING PERSON’S GUIDE TO AUTISM
Content note: Mention of suicide
Let’s talk about the benefits and considerations of pet ownership for autistic people.
Discussions about autism tend to focus on challenges and deficits, instead of discussing autistic traits neutrally, or highlighting autistic strengths. The idea that “all Autistic people are cats” and that “cats are Autistic” has even emerged as a playful metaphor, reflecting the shared traits between certain animals and the Autistic community. And indeed, cats have sensory sensitivities (e.g., are distressed by loud noises), use repetitive behaviors to self-soothe (e.g., grooming), prefer routine (e.g., feeding times), and ofter interact with humans via specific boundaries (e.g., enjoying being in the same space while keeping a distance). However, as with any generalization, it’s important to remember that not all Autistic people share these affinities, and individual experiences vary.
Despite the wealth of research available on the benefits of pet ownership in the general population, there is a surprising lack of information on how these benefits and struggles manifest specifically for Autistic people. Despite common knowledge of how strongly many Autistic people connect with animals, research on the synergy between Autistic traits and pet ownership is limited. Autistic adults are less likely to own pets than neurotypical people, even though pet ownership offers many benefits. For Autistic people and parents of Autistic children, choosing a pet requires careful thought about many factors.
Social Skills and Connection
Autism is partly characterized by differences in social communication and relationship-building—these traits being a central feature of autism’s DSM-V diagnostic criteria. Research has shown that interacting with animals can offer satisfying social experiences for Autistic people of all ages, as long as it is on their terms.
Communication and Social Development
While many Autistics are fine with their own company, others find that their struggle with initiating and maintaining conversations with non-autistic people leads to unintentional isolation and distress. Pets can provide a safe, non-judgmental, and consistent companionship without the same social pressures. Studies show pet ownership is linked to increased prosocial behaviors like smiling, laughing, and communication, which can improve relationships with non-autistic people, as well as helping inter-neurotype social development over time. Cat ownership, in particular, may help lower separation anxiety. Additionally, interacting with pets can support language development and general communication skills, allowing for practice without the stress of social interaction.
Pet ownership also encourages social interaction. I had the opportunity to interview Lucas Harrington, PsyD, an Autistic psychologist, about pet ownership. He shared that pets often serve as conversation starters, whether during walks, at dog parks, or online. He explained that in college, carrying his chinchillas around helped him initiate conversations with others, as people would approach to ask about the pets—bypassing the typical social initiation barrier. Discussing pets can also allow Autistic people to engage more easily in social exchanges, without the pressure of open-ended human interactions. Social media, in particular, offers a less overwhelming way for many Autistic people to connect and share their love for pets.
Emotional Understanding
Autistic people and non-Autistic people sometimes have trouble understanding each other because of the double empathy problem. While neurotypical people may have difficulty interpreting Autistic cues, Autistic people may also find it hard to understand nonverbal signals from neurotypical people. Pets, however, communicate in clearer ways through body language, vocalizations, and other straightforward signals. A dog may show discomfort by pulling away, whining, or retreating—signals that are often easier for Autistic people to recognize than more subtle neurotypical human social cues.
Research suggests that caring for a pet helps develop emotional understanding by allowing people to recognize and respond to the emotional needs of another living being. Pet ownership has been linked to increased offers to share or provide comfort to others, which may be a result of practicing these skills with pets. Over time, this can translate into better emotional understanding in human interactions.
Social Battery and Masking
Many Autistic people feel compelled to mask—conceal or suppress their natural behaviors—to fit neurotypical norms, leading to mental and physical exhaustion and social burnout. Pets, however, don’t require this kind of social “performance,” enabling Autistic people to engage freely without fear of judgment or following unwritten social rules. As Zack Siddeek, MSW, Autistic social worker and community organizer from the Arc of King County, explained in an interview with me, this is particularly beneficial for younger Autistic people who face social demands in school and public spaces. Pets provide a comforting, non-judgmental presence that helps people recharge their social battery.
Repetition and Routine
“Repetitive behaviors,” including a preference for routine and consistency, are another defining characteristic of autism. Pet ownership can both support and challenge Autistic people’s need for structure, depending on the pet’s behavior and the owner’s specific needs.
Routine and Structure
The daily care of a pet—whether feeding, walking, or grooming—can provide a sense of routine and predictability that is often comforting for Autistic people. Animals thrive on consistency, and many pets follow predictable schedules for eating, sleeping, and exercise. For Autistic people who struggle with uncertainty or change, these routines can provide a sense of control and emotional stability. Managing a pet’s needs may also help build an Autistic person’s confidence in their ability to be responsible for others, as owners must plan ahead for feeding times, medical appointments, and other tasks.
Additionally, pet ownership can help build skills in decision-making and time management. Owners must weigh options when choosing pet food, deciding on appropriate training methods, and considering the pet’s health and well-being. This requires long-term planning and organization—skills that are valuable in both personal and professional settings. However, it’s important to recognize that not all Autistic people may find the responsibilities of pet ownership to be easy. For example, those with executive function challenges and/or who have less social support may find it difficult to manage the complexities of pet care, such as remembering appointments, organizing supplies, or maintaining a consistent schedule. In such cases, alternative options, like a pet that requires less attention, should be considered.
Encouraging Flexibility
While routine is important, pet ownership can also encourage flexibility. Pets, especially younger or more energetic ones, may not always adhere to the owner’s planned schedule. For instance, a dog may need a bathroom break unexpectedly, or a pet might get sick and require immediate care. These situations, while potentially stressful, offer valuable opportunities to practice flexibility and adaptability. Over time, this can help Autistic people who are willing to undertake these challenges develop greater comfort with uncertainty and change.
Sensory Considerations
Autistic people often experience heightened sensory sensitivity, which can affect how they perceive and interact with the world around them. Pets can provide both beneficial and challenging sensory input.
Calming Sensory Input
For some, interacting with animals can provide soothing sensory experiences. The soft fur of a cat or dog, the rhythmic sound of a pet purring, or the comforting weight of a dog resting on a lap can be deeply calming. Certain pets, such as dogs, can offer deep pressure stimulation through activities like cuddling or being petted. This type of sensory input can help regulate emotions, reduce anxiety, and improve overall well-being. Zack Siddeek said that growing up with pets, spending time with them and petting them, allowed him to center himself when feeling overwhelmed.
Additionally, some pets, like reptiles or fish, provide a calming presence without overstimulating sensory input. Watching fish swim in an aquarium, for example, can have a meditative effect, promoting relaxation and mental clarity. For Autistic people who are particularly sensitive to loud noises or strong smells, pets like cats, fish, or smaller animals may be a better fit than dogs—whose barking, overly friendly personalities, or scent may be overwhelming.
Health Benefits
Autism is often accompanied by co-occurring conditions, including anxiety, depression, and ADHD. Research suggests that pet ownership can provide numerous mental and physical health benefits that may improve the quality of life for Autistic people.
Mental Health Benefits
Pets can offer a source of emotional support, reducing feelings of loneliness and isolation that many Autistic people experience. The act of caring for a pet provides a sense of purpose, which can be particularly beneficial for those struggling with depression; both cat and dog ownership has been shown to be protective against suicide. Pets can also help lower stress levels and promote relaxation by increasing the production of oxytocin, a hormone linked to emotional bonding and well-being, and petting them can help lower blood pressure. Moreover, pet ownership can help reduce symptoms of anxiety, from Separation Anxiety to OCD. Overall family functioning also tends to be rated higher in families with pets, suggesting that pet ownership benefits can extend to whole families.
Owning a pet can also make a person more likely to get up and out of the house, complete tasks that are important to them (e.g., caring for their pet), and develop a routine, all of which can be helpful for people struggling with mental health conditions like depression. Additionally, the routine and structure needed to care for a pet may improve executive functioning by necessitating time management, organization, and goal setting. However, people with executive dysfunction challenges should carefully and realistically consider their ability to fully care for a pet (across species).
Physical Health Benefits
Pet ownership has been linked to numerous physical health benefits, including increased physical activity and improved cardiovascular health. Walking a dog regularly provides an opportunity for exercise, which can be beneficial for both physical health and emotional regulation. Additionally, the routines associated with pet care, such as feeding and walking, can help provide structure and stability, which may be especially helpful for people with ADHD or other attention-related differences.
Considerations Before an Autistic Person Gets a Pet
Before making the decision to get a pet, there are several factors to consider:
What challenges should I consider for myself or my child?
- Disruptions to routine: Pets can interfere with established schedules. An Autistic person who thrives on routine might struggle with unexpected pet needs like illness, or bathroom breaks. A pet care chart or app can help manage tasks, especially if executive functioning is a struggle.
- Sensory overload: Some Autistic people may have heightened sensitivity to sounds, smells, or touch. A pet’s barking, fur shedding, or need for close contact could cause sensory overload.
- Time, cost, and travel needs: Pets require consistent care, supplies, and vet visits. These costs—both financial and time-related—can add up quickly. You’ll also need to plan for how to take care of the pet while traveling (e.g., arranging for a pet sitter, boarding the pet). Travel with pets can sometimes be challenging, depending on the type of pet.
- Grief and bonding challenges: A pet’s illness or death can be emotionally intense. Likewise, the bond may not form as expected, especially at first. Some animals (like cats) may be more independent. Be ready for different emotional outcomes.
Pets can require flexibility in your lifestyle, especially in the first few months of adjustment. Consider your or your child’s current routines, energy levels, and emotional bandwidth. A pet brings joy, but also stress, especially during the adjustment phase.
What type of pet would best suit my or my child’s needs?
- Dog: Great for companionship, especially if trained as service or emotional support animals. Calmer breeds (like Golden Retrievers or Labradors) may suit sensory or social needs better.
- Cat: Often more independent and quieter, which can work well for people who prefer less physical interaction or noise.
- Smaller pets (e.g., rabbits, guinea pigs, hamsters): Low-maintenance and less demanding, but some can be sensitive to touch or stress easily.
- Fish: Peaceful and visually calming—ideal for sensory-sensitive people who want minimal physical interaction.
It’s also important to remember that individual animals within a species can vary. Not all dogs, for example, will be the same in terms of temperament and behavior, so adopting a pet that has a predictable demeanor, especially if calmness is a priority, is essential.
What can I or my child do to better prepare?
- Foster or pet-sit first: Fostering a pet or pet-sitting for friends/family can be a good way to practice, and get a feel for what pet ownership would be like without the full commitment.
- Talk to pet owners: Ask for advice from friends, family, or online communities of pet owners. It’s helpful to learn about the realities of pet ownership from others.
- Research pet care needs: Spend time researching what you need to care for your pet, such as food, toys, grooming tools, and medical supplies.
- Time to bond: Building a relationship with your pet takes time. Set aside specific time each day for you or your child to interact, so that a bond has time to form.
- Get a new routine in place: Start integrating pet care into your or your child’s routine before bringing the pet home. This will help ease the transition, and hopefully prevent overwhelming you.
- Volunteer at an animal shelter: Volunteering can give hands-on experience with different types of animals and help you or your child understand what responsibilities come with pet ownership
How can I or my child practice certain skills with pets?
- Routine-building: Daily feeding, walking, or cleaning can create structure and help with executive functioning.
- Emotional regulation: Pets occasionally misbehave or get sick—these moments offer opportunities to build patience and manage emotional responses.
- Social Opportunities: Pets can be conversation starters and offer shared activities like walks or trips to pet stores and parks.
- Emotional understanding: Caring for a pet builds awareness of another being’s needs, providing opportunities to experience compassion and connection, without human judgment.
Conclusion
Pet ownership can offer significant benefits for Autistic people, including improved social opportunities, sensory comfort, and routine. However, it’s important to assess your or your loved one’s needs and abilities before committing. The right pet can enhance quality of life, offering both rewards and challenges. By considering the factors discussed in this article, families and people can make an informed decision about whether pet ownership is a good fit.
Image by loveninga from Pixabay
